I must have like really made fun of a crazy weird guy in a past life, because the CrAndy just keeps getting worse. Oh wait. That was THIS life.
Today? He called me "Jesse-Roo". Um, sir? No nicknames. We are not friends. IEW. BLECH. Currently, he is hovering to my left pretending to look at DVDs. In reality he is trying really, really, hard for me to make eye contact with him. And? He is chomping on some gum cow-style. I have a severe case of the heebies. And the jeebies.
Also? Our toilets here become clogged on a regular basis. AND we are always out of toilet paper. Can people stop coming to the library to take massive shits? Can you do that at your own freakin' toilet? And today I had the pleasure of PLUNGING A TOILET at the library. I have my Master's degree, and yet I must plunge up some fucking patron's POO because they have shat up the whole toilet. And mind you? It didn't work. Still clogged. Still about to overflow. There's that much poo. This reminds me of "Scrubs: The Musical" that was on on Thursday. Everything comes down to poo. The library is for learning...not shitting. You people don't even want to KNOW the nastiness that I have seen in these bathrooms. Men's AND women's. And like some people? Will stay here ALL day. And keep using the restrooms, using the restrooms....THIS IS NOT YOUR HOME. GO TO YOUR HOME! DON'T YOU WANT TO GO TO YOUR HOME??
Today is officially the WORST DAY EVER at work. I am foul. I am huffy. I am fulfilling every stereotype of the rude, arrogant librarian. Today all people are stupid, gross, smelly, beasts who are disgusting to me in every way. Plus, I have the pleasure of spending yet ANOTHER day sniffing the delectable StinkBrarian. Take.A.Fucking.Shower.
I am about to go CrAndy on her ass. (Meaning I'm about to open fire unexpectedly.)
ETA: I keep adding to this post because more awesomely horrible things keep occurring. CrAndy, has returned for trip 3 this afternoon and has requested a DVD that he had previously checked out which he wants back. I would like you all to read the description of said DVD, which is categorized as an "Erotic Comedy".
Better Than Chocolate:Two attractive young lesbians, Maggie and Kim, meet in Vancouver, develop a passionate romance, and move in together. Meanwhile, Maggie's well-meaning but naive mother Lila gets divorced and decides to move to Vancouver and join the household. Soon after, Lila is befriended by Judy, a transsexual about to undergo a sex-change operation. Complications ensue as the conservative Lila learns the truth about Maggie, Judy, and their diverse group of friends.
All I can think of is CrAndy sitting at home watching the love scenes from this movie over and over and over and then coming into the library to stare at me and KnuffleBunny.
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