For your viewing pleasure: http://www.ashaofantares.com/
I leave you to guess where and from whom I got this website my fine blog readers.
And I totally forgot to tell you guys about the completely scarring experience I had at The Yellow River Game Ranch with SeeStephGo.
Don't worry. It's still basically one of my most favoritist magical places on earth...
It was the week before Christmas and all through The Ranch,
EVERY creature was stirring, even Ranch-Hands!
We fed the deer carrots and cracked corn with care,
In hopes that they wouldn't loose anymore hair.
Ok. I'll be honest with you. I was basically pretty determined to tell this WHOLE story in poetry? But that's too fucking hard. So, be happy you got that.
So anyway, SeeStephGo and I are happily feeding all the wee animals snacks and snuggling with the deer and making the bears wave and all that awesome stuff. And it's lovely and thereputic and great. It's a beautiful sunny winter day, there were no crowds...truly blissful.
And we're like feeding the goats when all the sudden this like RanchHand dude just LEAPS into the GoatPen. And all the Goats like run for their lives. And we're just like OMG OMG OMG what's about to HAPPEN?!?! Then he just grabs like an adorable little tan goat and takes it out of the pen...
The Goat? BLEATING HORRIBLY. Like BLEEEAAAT! BLEEEEAAAAAAAAT!
SeeStephGo (to other RanchHand): WHERE IS HE TAKING THAT GOAT?!?!
RanchHand: To a Nay-Tiv-Ity Scene.
Goat: BLEEEEAT! BLEEEEEAT! WHY BABY JESUS?!?! WHYYYY?
SeeStephGo: Jesus doesn't want this! JESUS DOESN'T WANT THAT GOAT!
RanchHand: Don't you worry! He'll be fiiiiiiine. Got couple animals goin' to that Nay-Tiv-Ity Scene today!
You guys? I cannot emphasize ENOUGH the horrible, heart wrenching cry of this goat. Like SeeStephGo and I were CRYING. And I mean, we were laughing at the fact that we were crying, but crying nontheless.
I mean, relating this story is causing me to tear up AGAIN. Like RIGHT NOW.
I hope that goat made the FakeBabyGee happy.