Today? I dedicate my ENTIRE DAY to the Mistress of Awesome that is Kate Winslet.
Booyah to her for taking home TWO Golden Globes last night. And I'm not gonna lie? When she was all "Leo, you don't know how happy it makes me to stand up here and tell you how much I love you" I...um...might've cried a little.
I'll never let go, Kate. I'll never let go!
Her wins, and my complete and utter obsession with her, have solidified the fact that I need to see "The Reader" IMMEDIATELY. As far as "Revolutionary Road" goes...I mean you can see my little review of the book over there (points to the left)...and with Kate and Leo all up in those characters, I have no DOUBT it's a phenomenal flick. That being said...when I go see it, that needs to be the only thing I do all day.
Like, I don't want to spoil it for you guys? But BAD SHIT HAPPENS.
I mean, like I need to be in the most zen, at peace, half drunk on chocolate fountain type of mood to see that movie. Then? Post-movie, I need to have immediate access to a snuggly blanket, a warm brownie, red-wine and "The Princess Bride."
Speaking of warm brownies, yours truly had some MAD GAME at a bar this past Saturday. Oh yes, it's time for another episode of "Men Who Say Totally Inappropriate Things to Me in Bars"!
Ok, so I went out with some college pals and Husband and some folks to a bar by our Alma Mater. They had this amazingly delicious cheesy cover band, so naturally I spent the evening busting a sweet groove to the likes of Journey, ACDC, and um....other...stuff...I don't remember because...um...I was really....uh....cold? Hot? Hungry? Whatever. Anyway, I'm just having' a grand ole' time dancing away with Abs220 as well as another great guy pal from college. Henceforward he shall be known as SecretTwin, because if ever there was a male counterpart to me, it's kind of this guy. Also? If we're twins? We could get into all sort of twin related trouble, and hijinks...and such. Anyhow...so I'm dancing. And these two guys just come up and start dancing on me, like ya do. And they are clearly young. And I feel like they go to AlmaMater. And you know, Husband WORKS at AlmaMater, so maybe not such a good idea to let these young men shake their booty with his wife. So I'm like:
Me: Hey. Do you guys go to AlmaMater?
Soccer1: Yeah! I'm a senior.
Soccer2: Yeah, I'm a senior, I'm 22!
Me: Oh jeebs. Um...you guys know I'm Husband's wife, right?
Soccer1: I'm sorry what? (runs away)
Soccer2: I don't care! I don't care if you're married! I don't care who your husband is!
Soccer2: You are SO BEAUTIFUL, and I just want to dance with you.
Me: Are you making fun of me?
Soccer2: WHAT?! No! Why would I do that? You're so pretty! I was actually about to ask you to meet me in the parking lot...so I could try and take you home.
Soccer2: I completely would take you home with me...right now. Really. I mean would you? Fifteen minutes.
Me: That is certainly enough young man! Pish Posh! Fiddle Faddle! Off with you!
So then, I like go back over to Husband who has found this exceedingly amusing, and relate the story. And this is his response:
Husband: He's a soccer player, what do you expect?
Also, you should be aware that drunk dude now comes in twice a day. Every day. Once in the morning, where I guess he hasn't taken a bath in Jim Beam yet, and then once round about evening time, when you can light a match in front of him and he would just burst immediately into flames. Now, since he's fucking WASTED every time he comes in, we literally have to give him the same information over, and over, AND OVER again because his drunk ass can't remember/understand/comprehend whatever the crap.
I mean seriously. Why? And where exactly is he going to get hammered? All I have to say is that it better damn well be in WALKING distance.
Babs has affectionately nicknamed him Alcohol Joe, so that's going to be his name on this bloggie too. And like, don't think I didn't totally try to spy on whatever email he's secretly sending to his "wife." All I saw was "I always do, baby".
So, naturally Babs and I have our guesses as to what it might be he "always does". They include but are not limited to the following:
1. I always do toast you on my first PBR of the night.
2. I always do call you when I'm being fingerprinted.
3. I always do show off the tat I got of your butt cheek.
4. I always do think of you when I'm face down in my own puke.
5. I always do take public transit when I'm drinkin' baby.
At least, one hopes.